Tuesday, March 29, 2005

The Last Straw

I have witnessed THE LAST STRAW. Over the weekend, our cat Countess has metamorphosised from mild-mannered and aloof to PSYCHO ATTACK CAT.
It happened on a day just like any other day in which our dog was bugging the cats. Poirot is a blob by nature and more or less lays down and takes whatever the dog will dish out. I think his theory is that if he ignores the dog long enough, eventually it will just rot away.
Countess, on the other hand, usually avoids the dog by staying high enough not to be reached and stares down upon him like "Fool. You are and will always be a lesser being."
However, this day was different. The dog was dancing around on the floor and yapping at Countess, trying as always to provoke her into...something...but this time IT WORKED.
It was like watching Gollum get really pissed. Or that scene where Bilbo turns into Scary Bilbo but I couldn't find any pictures of that. First we heard her...growl can be the only appropriate description. Then the eyes became enormous, the tail took on that electrocuted look, and the claws came out. Within seconds, she was flying through the air with ALL FOUR claws aimed directly at dear dog's face.
Fortunately he has very quick reflexes and turned tail to run, but she chased him until she had him cornered in the bedroom. Then she let out another growl as if to say, "Look at me the wrong way again and they'll be finding pieces of you in the litter box for weeks, buddy."
And things haven't been the same since. The dog is always up to a challenge, so it hasn't stopped him from attempting to provoke the cat. But we'll hear the growl, then the sound of stampeding around the carpet and then a Nazgul shriek that lets you know the cat has just detached one of the dog's limbs from the rest of his body. He takes what's left of his bleeding carcass away and doesn't mess with her for the rest of the day.
He is now accepting his role as the beta cat. He even does Sit and Lay Down for her, his attention glued to her expression to see if he has won approval. He hardly does that for us.
Perhaps we should try the growl & slash routine.

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